Fabulous Foreplay: What Women Wish Men Knew about Foreplay

I am so excited to have author Cynthia Gentry on Better Sex Radio this Wednesday at 11 a.m. Pacific. Cynthia is the author of "What Women Really Want In Bed" and I am very excited to interview her about her book. I just LOVED her chapter on foreplay and am going to "steal" a few excerpts from her book for you here to give you a little taste of what we will be talking about on Better Sex Radio. (Tune in at 11 a.m. at http://www.BlogTalkRadio.com/BlissRadio



"If you love sending your woman into a state of crazy desire before you do the deed" then this book is for you. Sure, everyone loves a quick ONCE IN AWHILE. There is a place and a time for a quickie. And I love this quote from her book, too. "Every interaction is foreplay" and that quote is credited to someone named Chole.



Foreplay for women is NOT optional. Remember, for women, it's often going to take our brain about 10 - 15 minutes to get in the moment. We just don't CLICK OVER like men seem to be able to. We are not quite as visually stimulated as men are. Just seeing a penis or his nipples does not instantly get us going like flashing a nipple or showing a little butt cleavage can do for a man.



I love this quote from Cynthia's book: " You gotta warm up the pan before you put the meat in." "Sure, you could slap your sausage in a cold skillet, but the cooking process is going to take a lot longer." And, if we don't get our foreplay, then to women it feels like the act is really just more for the male partner. Foreplay and sex are not separate to us. It's a part of the whole process. And, most women do not ORGASM without the foreplay.



I always like to coach men that if they want to see a VERY dirty, naughty lover in their bed... warm her up with some forepaly. Men always say they want "vacation" sex or they want their wife to act like they do when they are on vacation. My guess is that on vacation, there is some mood setting and lots of foreplay. You can't get a wild porn star in your bed unless you INVEST the time and energy into the "before" play.



Foreplay cannot be rushed? And, what in the heck is the hurry? It's like traveling with men. They are always in such a hurry to get to the final destination instead of pulling over to see all of the historical landmarks, fruit stands and the special vista spots. SLOW DOWN. It's about the journey. Stop to see the views and enjoy all of the landmarks!



Most women, when asked, say they would like 20 minutes of foreplay. 10 minutes is the very minimum. So, as Cynthia's books says - "Dont Rush The Foreplay." "Foreplay is as vital to women as control of the televistion remote is for guys." When Cynthia and her team interviewed women about foreplay they said over and over again "Longer is better", "slow down, take your time", "it's impossible to spend too much time on foreplay" and on and on.



Set the mood, slow down, enjoy the seduction, light a candle, give compliments, make her feel safe and turned on enough to be that PORN STAR you want in your bed. "We want the romance, but we also want some raunchy sex" according to "Heather, 25, Executive Assistant.



I am very excited to talk with Cynthia tomorrow. I hope you will tune in!

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9 Things Women Wish Men Knew Blog

9 Things Women Wish Men Knew
Sep 8th, 2009 by Chrystal Bougon , Sex Expert


Better Sex Radio is doing a full show this Wednesday about all of the things women wish every man knew. Most of these topics and ideas came in from our customers and listeners. Thank you all for emailing us your topics for us to discuss this week on the radio!

Better Sex Radio


#1 We have a spot on our body that is our “cryptonite” and it’s at the back of our neck, underneath our ears and when we can hear you breathing excitedly or when you nibble lightly on our neck, we turn into a big bowl of LUSTY VIXEN jello. We are all yours when you spoon with us and nibble on that area.
#2 When we ask if we look fat in something, we are hoping you might give a compliment of some kind. If you don’t want to answer the question, compliment us on some other feature. (Do tell us if the outfit is just really hideous and embarassing. If it’s not, just tell us sincerely we look beautiful.)
#3 No, we do not want to give you a b.j. during the football game unless you want to go down on us while we are watching The Shopping Channel.
#4 We have been convinced by the media that we are inadequate, too fat, too skinny, too ugly, etc. We need to hear what you think of us. We need to hear you think we are hot. We need to hear this every other day!
#5 Front to back ONLY ever! Our va jay jay is very sensitive and a complicated place. Please keep your fingers clean, nails cut short, and never ever go back to front.
#6 Our nipples are not radio dials. Please massage our breasts gently and start off slow with the nipple nibbling so we can warm up to some more intense nibbling. We NEVER enjoy the MOTORBOAT action on our bewbies.
#7 We love porn, too. Stop hiding your stash so well .. it just forces us to search in all of your special hiding places when we want to borrow it. And, no, even though we have teeny tiny breasts it does not offend us that all of your porn starts with the words “Juggs.” We know you like variety.
#8 We LOVE to recieve oral sex, too. PERIOD. END OF STORY. No, we don’t want to 69. We want to just relax and recieve and just get lost in it like you do. 69 occasionally, but let’s just take turns like lesbians do. Did you know when surveyed, girl/girl couples have the highest sexual satisfaction. They know what they are doing!
#9 Sex toys do not replace you, they enhance you. Stop being jealous of something that can only help you.

Tune in to Better Sex Radio at http://www.Bliss-Radio.com/Tune-In
Check out our tasteful online sex toy store at http://www.BlissConnection.com
Blissfully,
Chrystal Bougon, Sex Expert & Pleasure Coach
Tel: 408-826-9087

We do pleasure parties all over the Bay Area. Http://www.BlissPartiesInc.com

Can you be Sexy at any size? Hell yes!

Can you be FAT & SEXY? Hell YES! Confidence is SEXY at any size.

A friend of mine (who is NOT fat) wrote this fabulous blog that "Sexy Comes in All Sizes"http://aspirelifecoaching.org/blog/2009/05/sexy-comes-in-all-sizes/Susan is an amazing woman, life coach and all around inspirational woman. Her blog reminded me of when I owned an Adult Store where we sold lingerie. I noticed two things when I would help women try on lingerie.

First of all, thin women are SO HARD on themselves and have so much negative SELF TALK around their bodies. Being a PLUS SIZED woman myself, I always thought it was so strange that they were so hard on themselves when they had obviously hit that "media goal" of being a size 6.When larger women would come into our store, they were way more "in reality" about where they were and how they looked and were focused on finding a style of lingerie that flattered their bodies.

They had this attitude of "oh well, I want to surprise my lover and I am a size 18" and were just more matter of fact about it while we searched for the perfect piece of lingerie for their ample bosom or ample bottom - or both.It also reminded me how very petite women and very thin women sometimes have as much or more difficulty finding cute clothes or lingerie as their plus sized or tall sisters have. It's the same PROBLEM just different ends of the spectrum.She also reminded me how strongly I feel about this issue. My business is all about helping women and couples to have BETTER SEX.

I do that via my Online Romance Store http://www.BlissConnection.com/ and our Home Pleasure Parties www.BlissPartiesInc.com . We also have a radio show called "Everyone Wants to Have Better Sex" at www.WSRadio.com/BetterSexRadio .I am sharing my reply to Susan Liddy's Blog about "Sexy Comes in All Size"Thanks for creating a dialogue about this, Susan. I talk to so many women week after week who are putting their sex lives and other fun stuff on hold until they are that perfect size. LADIES - Sieze The Day!

All you have is today. You may not be on this planet tomorrow. Enjoy exactly what you have and exactly who you are NOW. You should not put the really really fun stuff on hold until you lose those last 10 lbs...you could be working on those last 10 lbs the rest of your life. WHY WAIT?
And, guess what? Some men PREFER saggy breasts, big butts, or a little pooch around the tummy. Granted, some men are into toned and sculpted - but my point is that if there are equal amount of men that love BIG HUGE breasts as there are men who love ITTY BITTY breasts, that that would hold true on body size preferences, too. (If you don't believe me, google all of the pay sites out there dedicated to ENORMOUS BREASTS and the pay sites dedicated to the ITTY BITTY TITTY COMMITTEE. There are thousands and thousands of both kinds.)

Confidence is what REALLY turns people on and just OWN IT ladies. Own who you are right now and enjoy life and all the pleasures that your body can bring - size 2 or size 22!
Can you tell I feel strongly about this issue? I am a size 22 and I am here to ENJOY who I am now at this very moment - not who the media tells me I should be. Of course, this has been a life long battle for me as I have been overweight since about the 4th grade. Sometimes I get wrapped up in the way the magazines depict women and celebrities, but then I remind myself I AM SEXY and I deserve to love and be loved just like anyone else!I believe all women (all people) are sexy in their own way and we just need to realize all of our beauty and potential.

When we do that, then we will all HAVE BETTER SEX! Let go of your body image hangups and just let yourself enjoy every thing you can - even if you are SUPER SKINNY or SUPER FAT. Like I said above, Sieze the Day ladies!

Happy Memorial Day Weekend!

Blissfully, ChrystalChief Toy Officer & Pleasure Coachhttp://www.blissconnection.com/Tel: 866-200-9475Email: Chrystal@BlissPartiesInc.com
Tune in to our Award Winning Radio Show athttp://www.WSRadio.com/BetterSexRadio
Related: susan liddy, skinny girl sex, sex toys bay area, sex, pleasure party bay area, fat girl sex, confidence is sexy, chrystal bougon
Let’s talk: Comment (8) Blog
Posted by newageknight Fri May 22, 2009 1:49pm PDT
I'm glad that women are starting to realize that they don't need to be super skinny because frankly it's getting annoying. I knew a girl in high school who was absolutely gorgeous inside and out but she felt she needed to lose weight. The girl was just under 6 feet tall and couldn't have weighed more than like 120-130 pounds. It was a little saddening.
If the woman likes herself, guys will notice and it'll be really hard for her to keep guys away (I've got another friend who's in that situation).Report Abuse

Posted by farra Fri May 22, 2009 2:18pm PDT
everyone can be sexy you just have to take care of yourself and be healthyReport Abuse

Posted by Chrystal B Fri May 22, 2009 2:30pm PDT
I agree. Take good care of yourself, pay attention to your hygiene and what you wear - walk when the sun is shining and smile. LOVE yourself like the other comment says..... when you love yourself then someone can actully love you back.Report Abuse

Posted by marimaya Fri May 22, 2009 2:35pm PDT
I am sooooo happy to read this post. As a wedding & lifestyle photographer (www.marianamaya.com) I capture many sized women. 99.5% of the time when they see their pictures they comment on how happy, sexy & in love they look. Every now and then I do get a comment of "ugh I'm fat" to which I ask .."what does your boyfriend/husband/kids/ family/ friends think of your pictures?" and I watch as a big smile speads across their face as they reply "Oh they love them"
Regardless of your size you should always try to be happy with who you are, and realize you are loved for the person you are and not your looks. After all looks fade.
Mariana MayaReport Abuse

Posted by Chrystal B Fri May 22, 2009 9:02pm PDT
Mariana, thanks so much for the post. You are fabulous and super talented .... be sure to check out Mariana's portfolit at http://www.MariyanaMaya.comReport Abuse

Posted by 88Gypsy Sat May 23, 2009 10:07am PDT
You are so right on with this post!
In retrospect, I spent my 20’s beating up on myself for not looking ‘right’(I was a size 8) In my 30’s I became unhealthily obsessed with looking ‘perfect’ - enter the eating disorder - and down to a size 4.
Now I’m 40-ish, beat the eating disorder and looking back, thinking: God how I WISH I could have the body now that I had then. You know, back then when I was complaining about it.
Now back to a size 8 - and things aren’t quite as firm as they used to be and you know what? That’s just fine. My legs propel me through marathons, and are in training to bounce a grandchild on them. They’re good legs. My breast nourished children. They’re good breasts. My belly carried those kids and hid their crying faces against it to sheild them from the world for a moment. It’s a good belly. My round behind proudly proclaims my middle-eastern heritage (and thank you Kim Kardashian for making that ‘vogue) It’s a good butt.
I am not model thin. But I am strong, healthy and energetic. And what’s sexier than that?
Peace,
GypsyReport Abuse

Posted by Chrystal B Sat May 23, 2009 12:14pm PDT
88Gypsy - what a fabulous post. Strong, healthy, energetic and CONFIDENT. That is sexy. Get down with your bad ass round middle easter booty. I am sure you are extremely sexy and fab! :)Report Abuse

Posted by Life Coach Susan 2 hours 1 minute ago
Hi Chrystal!
I'm so excited that I inspired your blog post.
The more women we get on the "bandwagon"
the better it is for everyone.
Our media plays a HUGE role in our body image
"distortions". Seize the day! YES! And, take back
your right to love your body AS IS!
Woot!
-Susan

5 Tips for Making a Blow Job More Efficient

5 Ways to Make a B.J. More Efficient

Ok, I know - men NEVER want to hear the words "B.J. and efficient" together in once sentence.
But, honestly guys, we know some of you NEVER get one. So, these tips are for those women who just HATE to give the B.J. and rarely or even NEVER give one.

We do Pleasure Parties all over the Bay Area and I have personally facilitated about 850 pleasure parties myself. When we are in the comfort of our customers homes and we finish up our presentation, we allow the hostesses friends to come into the bedroom where we have our store set up and shop one person at a time. Believe me, once we close that door and we are 1 on 1 with our customers, we hear it ALL.We hear from women who do not give B.J.'s because they do not like the way the penis and "schweaty balls" smell or taste. We hear from women who are worried about "swallowing."

We hear women complain that it takes too long and their jaw gets tired. We hear it ALL!So, here are our "5 Tips for Making a B.J." more efficient. Gentlemen, I am pretty sure that if it came down to NO B.J. or an efficient one, you would choose the efficient kind, right?

1. Start the B.J. off early in the day by texting or emailing him that you are going to give him one that day. PRIME the PUMP so to speak, ladies. The more anticipation you can build the more exciited he is going to be that night.

2. If you REALLY do not like the way the penis smells, get him in the shower first or even shower with him. Now, I realize if you have small kids that this isn't a possiblity really, so send him in there to make everything nice and clean. More priming of the pump. (You can also put some Kama Sutra Honey Dust and dust his testicles and penis with it to make it smell better and taste better.)

3. For those of you who are REALLY skittish about ejaculate, you can also use a flavored condom and give a "strawberry" or "coconut" B.J. The flavored condoms taste good. I know you are thinking how GROSS condoms taste and normally that is true. But, the flavored condoms are designed specifically for oral sex.

4. Using a small, light vibrator on the testicles or under the testicles can also help to make the B.J. very efficient. You can incorporate a smallish vibrator and apply light pressure to the testicles while you go down on him and it can make very quick work of the B.J. One example is a small toy like the Silver Bullet vibe or even a vibrating Penis Ring like the sensuous love ring. I feel like giving someone oral sex is the highest compliment you can possibly pay someone. Putting someone's genitals in your mouth is saying "I really really like you ALOT." However, we all know that when we give him oral he is doing everything he can to PROLONG how long your mouth is on his penis. Who can blame him, right? However, when we have things to do, kids to check on, laundry to fold, mail to open, etc, we do not want to be down there ALL DAY. So, buy a small toy like the Silver Bullet and see if you can use it lightly on his testicles when you go down on him.!

5. Lastly, the "He" Spot can be massaged gently to make a B.J. very efficient, but we realize this is not for everyone. Massaging the "He" spot requires one finger inside of the anus and well, some people are just not going to EVER do that. (And, some men will NEVER even let you consider doing that.) But, when we talk to men at our Co-Ed Pleasure Parties, we hear them say all the time that having a "He" spot orgasm is very euphoric and it takes them back to their first orgasm when they were 12 or 13 years old.

Again, we are not recommending an Efficient ----- for everyone. This is really meant for the couples who rarely partake in this actiivty and for women who are extremely leary of giving oral sex to their husband or boyfriend. We hope it helps.

Have more questions? Call in to our radio show Wednesday, May 20th at 11 a.m. Pacific 888-327-0061 and ask your questions about oral sex, anal sex, g spot orgasms, the "he" spot orgasm and anything else that you would like answered.

You can hear our "Everyone Wants to Have Better Sex" radio show as we stream live here at http://www.WSRadio.com/BetterSexRadio at 11am to 12pm every Wednesday....this is our Award Winning Radio Show. Learn more about our Radio Award on our blog at http://www.Bliss-Radio.comEnjoy!

Blissfully, Chrystalhttp://www.BlissConnection.com
Tel: 408-826-9087Email: Chrystal@BlissPartiesInc.com

10 items 50% off in time for Memorial Day

We are having a BIG SALE just in time for some Bliss fireworks for your own Memorial Day Weekend!

10 Items 50% Off - You Must CLICK on these links to get the prices. No coupon required!

1. Tickle His Pickle - Your Hands On Guide by Sadie Allison On sale for $15

2. The Low Down on Going Down - learn how to give HER better oral On Sale for $12

3. S*x Swing / Love Swing $40 off $105 on sale & Free Shipping

4. Butterfly or Papillon Vibe for WomenOn sale for $14 (Some of the proceeds for this toy goes to Living With Breast Cancer. org.)

5. Jack Rabbit $25 Off on Sale for $50 instead of $75. (Free shipping since its more then $25.) This one is waterproof so you can take it in the shower, too.

6. Purring Thruster Panther Marked down to $85 from $135 (Free shipping and this is one of the "rabbit style" toys that thrust! )

7. Pocket Rocket Vibrator for Couples - Original Pocket Rocket on sale for $23 (This is a great price for this CLASSIC stimulator...and Howard Stern's favorite)

8. Love this G Spot Toy - Orchid G This toy can be a little loud as it is made with hard plastic...but it's so easy to clean and very intense for G, A or Clitoral stim.

9. The Big Man's Pump - don't want the guys to feel left out. This pump is on sale for $30 marked down from $60. Free shipping on this one, too.

10. Making Love Edible Massage Oil - Tastes fabulous, not sticky, subtly flavored so not too over powering. Vanilla and Kiwi Pineapple are very nice. On sale for $10

and one extra for good measure...not 50% off but marked down....

11. Kama Sutra Milk Chocolate Body Frosting - Marked down to $10 from $18 Remember to add a SILVER BULLET to your purchase! Only .01 penny.

Also, if you can share my FREE SILVER BULLET mission with your friends, network, newsletter, blog or on Facebook, here is a link of me talking about it on
You Tube:http://www.YouTube.com/FreeSilverBullet or you can share my website http://www.freesilverbullet.com/ .

It's my mission to help women stop faking it and just have an orga*m. The bullet is pretty much a guaranteed orga*m and works really well when you incorporate it into couples play, too.

Stop Faking it and Just Have an Orgasm

Ladies, STOP FAKING IT and JUST HAVE ONE!

Free Silver Bullet Vibrator: Our Mission to Get Every Woman in the U.S. a vibrator!
Every woman should own a Silver Bullet! You can order one here for FREE or call us at 866-200-9475 if you would prefer to order by phone. Our friendly, female customer service reps will help you to place your order.
Free Bullet Mission
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Silver Bullet Vibrator from www.BlissConnection.com
Welcome to our FREE SILVER BULLET website.

I am Chrystal, the owner and founder of http://www.blissconnection.com/ which is our very tasteful online sex toy store. I am convinced that every woman needs to own a Silver Bullet! I am on a mission to help every woman have an orgasm, to orgasm more easily and to own this simple, discreet sex toy. WE LOVE THIS toy and know you will, too. You can buy one here for free - you only pay $13.00 in UPS Ground Freight charges!

Why do you need a Silver Bullet Vibrator?+ Do you have difficulty having an orgasm?
+ Do you notice that it's nearly impossible to have an orgasm just from penetration?
+ Would you like to be less cranky and crabby?
+ Would you like to learn to have an orgasm in 2 - 3 minutes?
+ Would you like to enjoy your partner more and take all of the pressure off of both of you?
+ Would you like to train your clitoris and you body to become multi-orgasmic?
+ Ladies, would you like to make a blow job more efficient?

Then you NEED a FREE SILVER BULLET vibrator now! You only have to pay the $13.00 in UPS Ground Shipping. Ok, it's not free. It's 1 penny! Your total will be $13.01. Feel free to browse our VERY TASTEUL Online store http://www.blissconnection.com/ but you can just go directly to the SILVER BULLET here and buy it for only $13.01. Only one bullet per transaction please. If you want us to ship one to your BFF, just do two transactions.

Our Founder's Bio: Chrystal Bougon I am the owner and founder of http://www.blissconnection.com/ and have been doing Pleasure Parties all over the San Jose and San Francisco Bay Area since January 2002. I have talked to thousands and thousands of women and couples about how difficult it can sometimes be for women to have an orgasm. I call myself a Sexpert and a Pleasure Coach and love coaching women to start out with a SMALL sex toy like the Silver Bullet first and that owning and using a SILVER BULLET will change their lives for the better.It is very empowering for women to learn that their orgasm is THEIR OWN responsibility and it can happen VERY EASILY. It's not your partners job to give you an orgasm. It's your job to have an orgasm. Ladies, seriously, when you put this small vibrator on your clitoris it's pretty much a guaranteed orgasm. REALLY savvy men are not threatened at all by a vibrator. In fact, super smart men know that sex toys are their best friend! Incorporating a small vibrator like thebullet into your love making can make it SO MUCH better and SO MUCH MORE satisfying for both of you. It's pretty much a guaranteed orgasm, ladies. (Feel a theme here?)

I have been in the Sex Toy Industry for over 6 years and I worked in the Corporate world in Silicon Valley for 15 years. I also have tried pretty much every sex toy known to man and own every sex toy you can possibly own. And, even I can find a way to incorporate a Silver Bullet into my fun - this toy is perfect for beginners and advanced lovers, too.I hope you will take us up on our FREE BULLET. I am on a mission.

Now that Oprah and Barbara Walters are talking about sex toys on day time t.v., I think the world is ready for a FREE SILVER bullet. Every girl should own, two!

Enjoy! Blissfully, Chrystal

You can hear me STREAMING LIVE every Wednesday at 11am Pacific on Better Sex Radio at www.WSRadio.com/BetterSexRadio to learn how to incorporate sex toys into your love life. You can also download our Better Sex podcasts from www.ITunes.comFollow us on Twitter @ BlissConnectionTel: 408-826-9087 Toll Free: 866-200-9475
Email: Chrystal@BlissPartiesInc.com
Copyright http://www.blissconnection.com/ 2009. Tel: 866-200-9475 Email: Info@BlissPartiesInc.com
All Rights Reserved. Miss Bliss Image and the Silver Bullet Promo are all property of http://www.blissconnection.com/
Follow us on Twitter @ BlissConnection and please feel free to R/T this to the world. We want EVERY woman to have her Free Silver Bullet!